Dear Commander Timbit,
Great tragedy has befallen The house of Patrick. MY OFFICIAL TEAM SHIRT IS TOO SMALL!!!!!!
I blame the washing machine. It fit purrfectly and then Meowmy said it needed to be washed, cause it was “dirty”. I told her official team shirts don’t get “dirty” they stay clean cause we’re in space and space isn’t dirty. She said either it goes in the washer or I could wear it while getting a bath!!!! Either way it was getting cleaned.
(Dear Patrick – I so sorry to hear this terrible news. We wish your awesome shirt to rest in peace. Maybe tell your meowmy that obviously she shrunked it so you could have an awesome new baby brother. That will teach her to use serious threats like BATH. Meanwhile, I considering crew shirts, so maybe we can find a suitable replacement. Note to self: Non-shrinking! IN SOLIDARITY, Timbit)